Oct 072010

“There are anarthas, such as the desire for recognition and fame, in the heart, and they give you trouble. Now what are you going to do about them? Do you believe that they will eventually just automatically disappear? No. One should think, “Let’s look at what they are exactly. Why are they there? Let me open the closet,” and so on. Then let the light of Krishna consciousness shine on them.

I have done this over the past years and found great benefit. I see how things that I previously didn’t dare to look at now dissolve. And do you know why they dissolve? It is not because of my own strength. I am too weak. I am a conditioned soul. These materialistic anarthas have been here life after life. Just having knowledge of some verses will not drive them away. I sincerely have to turn to Krishna. And the question that Krishna asks is, “Wait a minute, you are asking me to take this away. Do you really want to lose it?” And I think, “Of course, we have our philosophy.” But Krishna asks, “Are you really prepared to become a humble devotee without any prestige and honor?” And then I have to scratch my head. And I begin to understand why my lips say, “I want to be pure,” yet my heart says, “But not just now, please. I actually like these things.” This is the situation of a conditioned soul who is divided.” — Sacinandana Swami