SB 5.13.4 – Stay Attached to Srila Prabhupada’s Family

Giriraj Swami:

oṁ namo bhagavate vāsudevāya

oṁ namo bhagavate vāsudevāya

oṁ namo bhagavate vāsudevāya

Reading from Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam, Canto Five, Chapter Thirteen, King Rahūgaṇa converses with Jaḍa Bharata, Text Four.

TEXT 4

nivāsa-toya-draviṇātma-buddhis
tatas tato dhāvati bho aṭavyām
kvacic ca vātyotthita-pāṁsu-dhūmrā
diśo na jānāti rajas-valākṣaḥ

TRANSLATION

My dear King, the merchant on the forest path of the material world, his intelligence victimized by home, wealth, relatives and so forth, runs from one place to another in search of success. Sometimes his eyes are covered by the dust of a whirlwind — that is to say, in his lust he is captivated by the beauty of his wife, especially during her menstrual period. Thus his eyes are blinded, and he cannot see where to go or what he is doing.

PURPORT by Srila Prabhupada

It is said that household attraction resides in the wife because sex is the center of household life: yan maithunādi-gṛhamedhi-sukhaṁ hi tuccham. A materialistic person, making his wife the center of attraction, works very hard day and night. His only enjoyment in material life is sexual intercourse. Therefore karmīs are attracted to women as friends or wives. Indeed, they cannot work without sex. Under the circumstances the wife is compared to a whirlwind, especially during her menstrual period.

COMMENT

Srila Prabhupada used to lament about the fallen condition of materialistic householders in the modern age. He used to speak in Bombay about the husbands who used to have to travel so many hours every day to go to work, then spend nine hours at work during the day, and then again travel so many hours to go back home at night. Some men even commute from Pune to Bombay, traveling four or five hours in the morning, then working, and traveling another four or five hours in the evening. Practically all they can do when they get home at night, because they are so exhausted, is take a little food, and go to sleep. And the next morning, they wake up, and immediately have to get ready to go to work.

So, Srila Prabhupada raised the very logical question, that they are spending so many hours going to and from work, why don’t they just get a place near their place of work and save all the time traveling?

Sri Sri Radha-Madhava ki jaya! Srila Prabhupada ki jaya!

Because they don’t have time for anything. So, why don’t they get some place in the city near the work, and save so much time? Eight hours going back and forth every day. Can anybody think of the reason why they don’t?

Devotee: They want to keep their wives comfortable.

Giriraj Swami: Yes, because when they go home at night, even though they are completely exhausted and frustrated from the day’s work, they’ll have a few moments of flickering happiness with their wife, and that’s the only thing that inspires them to work and struggle for so many hours every day.

So, Srila Prabhupada used to lament that the people are so foolish that just for a few moments of flickering happiness, they are spending hours and hours suffering, actually suffering, and not only suffering, but missing the real goal of human life, which is to become Krishna conscious and go back home, back to Godhead. So, he said they are so foolish, and so miserable. 

Prahlada Maharaja also used to lament the condition of the fallen souls. And he said, “For myself, I have no difficulty because wherever I am, I can absorb myself in chanting and hearing about Krishna and merge into the ocean of transcendental bliss, of transcendental nectar, but I do have one anxiety, and that is that so many poor souls are suffering in the material world and making plans for material enjoyment, but I know they cannot actually be happy. I know they can only be happy if they take shelter of Your lotus feet. So, I’m always thinking of how to bring them to Your shelter.”

Then Prahlada spoke the verse, which Srila Prabhupada quotes in the purport here, yan maithunādi-gṛhamedhi-sukhaṁ hi tuccham, that the happiness of sense gratification enjoyed between man and woman is most insignificant. Not only insignificant, but actually abominable. It is like someone who has itches, and when he scratches the itch, he thinks he is feeling some pleasure, but actually, he is not feeling pleasure, he is just getting some sort of relief from the itching sensation. But what is the actual result? That the itch becomes worse. Therefore, Prahlada Maharaja says that instead of scratching the itch and aggravating it, we should rather tolerate it. And if we tolerate it, gradually, the itch will subside.

When I was in Gorakhpur with Srila Prabhupada and the devotees in 1971, Srila Prabhupada asked me if I ever thought of getting married. So, I said, “Not really.” Then, Srila Prabhupada said, “Better not to.” He said, “Better you remain a brahmachari, and after some time, I will give you sannyasa.” Then he said, “The demands of the senses are like itches, and if we scratch the itch, it will become worse. So, better to tolerate, and by tolerating, the demands will reduce.” He said, “Not only sex life, but even hunger and thirst. They will subside just by tolerating the urge rather than trying to indulge the urge.”

PURPORT (continued)

Those who strictly follow the rules and regulations of householder life engage in sex only once a month, at the end of the menstrual period. As one looks forward to this opportunity, his eyes are overwhelmed by the beauty of his wife. Thus it is said that the whirlwind covers the eyes with dust. Such a lusty person does not know that all his material activities are being observed by different demigods, especially the sun-god, and are being recorded for the karma of one’s next body.

COMMENT

So, the householder, if he is somewhat religious, knows that he is not allowed to engage in sense gratification without restriction. He knows the Vedic principle, that relations with one’s wife is permitted only once in a month for the purpose of producing children, and then raising the children in Krishna consciousness. So, if he is lusty, then he’ll just be looking forward to that time.

But when Srila Prabhupada first explained the principles of householders association, one of the disciples remarked, “Srila Prabhupada, just for one time in a month to have to go through so much endeavor to maintain the wife and try to satisfy the wife in different ways, it’s not worth it. I think I would rather just give up the whole thing than have to work so hard just for once a month.” Srila Prabhupada replied, “Very intelligent, very intelligent!”

But still, there is scope for regulated householder life in Krishna consciousness, and the principle is that everything in the life of the devotee should be dovetailed in the service of the Lord. So, the act of procreation can also be dovetailed in the service of the Lord by producing children to become Krishna conscious, to become good devotees. And this is a very great responsibility for the householders.

And the Bhāgavatam says earlier in the same Canto that no one should become a mother, no one should become a father, no one should become a husband, what to speak of a guru, unless he can deliver his dependents from the repetition of birth and death. Unless you are ready to take responsibility for your dependents and deliver them from the repetition of birth and death, you shouldn’t become a mother, or a father, or a husband, or a spiritual master. And in the purport, Srila Prabhupada comments that the only way that someone can become delivered from the repetition of birth and death is if he becomes a pure devotee.

Therefore, the husband must train the wife. He himself must act as a pure devotee and train the wife to act as a pure devotee. Similarly, the father and mother must train the children to act as pure devotees. And of course, the spiritual master must train the disciples. So, this is the responsibility in addition to material maintenance, and if one takes the responsibility to heart and really works hard to fulfill one’s duties, then he’ll become purified. This is called responsible householder life.

Srila Prabhupada did not condemn householder life, but he condemned irresponsible householder life. So, we should be responsible if we want to have sense gratification. We should be responsible, and to have children and raise them in Krishna consciousness. And to be responsible means actually to suffer. Every mother knows as soon as she has the baby, how much she has to suffer. She actually becomes the servant of the baby. Whenever the baby screams or cries, the mother has to do something to pacify the baby. The baby may cry in the middle of the night, and the mother has to wake up and take care of the baby. So, there are so many responsibilities. And between the husband and wife also, so many compromises have to be made to maintain friendly relations.

So, a lot of sacrifice is involved, and without such sacrifice or tapasya, we cannot advance in Krishna consciousness. So, every ashram involves tapasya, brahmachari ashram also, and sannyasa ashram also, and grihastha ashram also, and by accepting responsibility, accepting the austerities involved in the ashram, one can gradually become purified and lose the taste for sense enjoyment. But the real way to lose the taste for sense enjoyment and the best way is to develop a higher taste. And therefore, following the regulative principles is just the background for the real activities of hearing, and chanting, and serving Krishna. That will help us to develop the higher taste, and when we actually develop the higher taste, then we will lose interest in pale, dead material things. The body is dead, actually, it’s dead. It’s only due to the illusion that we think that it’s alive.

So here, the four Kumaras have given us a very nice verse in the Fourth Canto, yat-pāda-paṅkaja-palāśa-vilāsa-bhaktyā, that one who engages in the service of the toes or the petals of the lotus feet of the Lord can overcome hard knotted desires for material enjoyment. Other transcendentalists like jnanis and yogis cannot do so, because the waves of desire come one after the other, just like the waves of a river, without any stoppage.

Therefore, bhaja vāsudevam, one should worship Vasudeva in bhakti-yoga, and that is the only way. The example of the waves in the river is very appropriate. They keep on coming, and in the same way, material desires keep on coming, we cannot stop them. Jnanis and yogis try to artificially stop them, but they cannot succeed. They keep coming like waves. So, how can the devotee stop them? He can stop them not by trying to stop desire altogether, but by replacing the inferior desire with superior desire. And the superior desire is to serve Krishna, to serve Guru and Gauranga.

Only by replacing this inferior desire with the superior desire of devotional service can we become free from the material desires. And here, Srila Prabhupada gives a beautiful example. He says that the waves in the river keep coming without stopping, but where do the waves go? They flow into the ocean, and sometimes the waves in the ocean at the time of high tide overflood the river, and the waves of the ocean become more prominent than the waves of the river. So, in the same way, when our desires to serve Krishna become more and more strong, they actually become more prominent than the desires for sense gratification. And therefore, the devotee always remains engaged in thinking how to satisfy the senses of the Lord, especially how to spread the saṅkīrtana movement throughout the material world. And by such strong spiritual desires, he can overcome what are otherwise strong material desires.

I also have had one practical experience. In 1972, Srila Prabhupada entered an agreement to purchase Hare Krishna Land in Juhu Bombay, but the owner of the land named Mr. Nair was actually a cheater, quite a cheater, and he had already entered agreements with other parties to sell the land to them, and by some tricky maneuver, he canceled the agreement, and kept the money that they deposited for the purchase. So, he tried the same thing with Srila Prabhupada, and he was so ruthless and so cunning that he resorted to very low tactics.

So, in the early stage of the fight with Mr. Nair, he arranged for one prostitute to come. Anyway, I can’t go into all the details, but basically, he arranged the seating in such a way that she was sitting next to me, and I had no way of escaping, and she was just touching. . . I didn’t know she was a prostitute, I didn’t really know what was going on, but she was touching different parts of my body, and I was only twenty-four years old.

So, I got quite disturbed, and I was thinking, Well, who cares what happens? Even if I have to suffer, who cares? But then I thought, If I do this, it’s not just that I’m going to suffer. What will really happen is that Srila Prabhupada will suffer, because I won’t be able to execute his mission, and probably the news will spread. It will be a big scandal, and in the end, Srila Prabhupada will be the one who will suffer. Then I thought, No, I can’t do anything that will cause Srila Prabhupada to suffer. And somehow, I escaped the situation, and made sure I didn’t come into a similar situation again.

Then afterwards, I was thinking that for myself, I was ready to become a little careless, but for Srila Prabhupada, I wouldn’t. And then I realized how powerful Srila Prabhupada’s mercy is, that he can actually take very ordinary people from very ordinary backgrounds, and create so much faith in him, or attachment for him, that we would be ready to give up all other attachments for the sake of his service.

And when I read the purport, I realized that this is the actual process, that we have to become more attached to the service of the spiritual master than we are to sense gratification, and that’s the only way that we can really give up inferior desires, which will lead us to hell.

PURPORT (continued)

Thus it is said that the whirlwind covers the eyes with dust.

COMMENT

One becomes blinded. In Bhagavad-gītā, Lord Krishna says, jñāna-vijñāna-nāśanam, that by lust, one becomes blind, and his knowledge becomes covered, and his desire for self-realization becomes covered.

PURPORT (continued)

Thus it is said that the whirlwind covers the eyes with dust. Such a lusty person does not know that all his material activities are being observed by different demigods, especially the sun-god, and are being recorded for the karma of one’s next body.

COMMENT

I’ve actually heard of disciples talking amongst themselves about the regulative principles for householder life, and saying, “Who knows? Nobody will know.” But it’s not true, all the demigods are witnesses, and especially the Supersoul is the witness. So, we shouldn’t think that nobody will know and there will not be any reaction.

PURPORT (continued)

Astrological calculations are called jyoti-śāstra. Because the jyoti, or effulgence, in the material world comes from the different stars and planets, the science is called jyoti-śāstra, the science of the luminaries. By the calculations of jyoti, our future is indicated. In other words, all the luminaries — the stars, sun and moon — witness the activities of the conditioned soul. Thus he is awarded a particular type of body. A lusty person whose eyes are covered by the dust of the whirlwind of material existence does not at all consider that his activities are being observed by different stars and planets and are being recorded. Not knowing this, the conditioned soul commits all kinds of sinful activities for the satisfaction of his lusty desires.

COMMENT

So, there are so many witnesses, and especially the Supersoul is the all-pervading witness of everything we do, and He makes note of all of our sinful activities, and He arranges for the appropriate punishment through the appropriate agents. The Fifth Canto of the Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam also explains various hellish punishments awarded for various types of sins. And sometimes, Srila Prabhupada would explain that if you do this, you get this reaction, if you do that, you get that reaction. But when one reporter asked Srila Prabhupada, “What is the reaction for illicit sex?” Of course, Srila Prabhupada replied, “There may be so many diseases that one can get.” But then he said, “The real reaction is that one will lose the chance to become Krishna conscious.”

And maybe Parasara Muni, one of the sages in the scriptures, says that there is no greater calamity, no greater anomaly, and no greater catastrophe than forgetting Krishna. So, if we break the regulative principles, then gradually, we will forget Krishna more and more. By dwelling on the objects of the senses, lust develops. From lust comes anger. From anger comes delusion or illusion. From illusion or delusion comes bewilderment of memory. When one’s memory is bewildered, one’s intelligence is lost, and then he falls down into the material whirlpool. So, we have to be very careful. It just starts by dwelling on the objects of the senses.

When I first joined in Boston, I was very careful about maya, very afraid of maya. I’d never look anywhere. I would just look down, and Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna, Krishna Krishna, Hare Hare / Hare Rama, Hare Rama, Rama Rama, Hare Hare. I wouldn’t want to go to the corner store to shop. I wouldn’t want to do anything, and if I had to go, I would always take another devotee with me.

So, after a few weeks of being very careful and cautious, once, when we were on the van going out on saṅkīrtana, I just peeked out of the window, just to see what it looked like, and I thought, Well, it doesn’t really look so bad. I was thinking, maybe by Krishna consciousness, I was becoming able to better appreciate the material world.

So, there was one other devotee in the van with me named Nandakishor, and he was a nice devotee from Boston. So, I never did anything independently, so I said, “Sometimes I look out of the window, and the material world looks a little attractive. Is this all right? What’s actually happening?”

So, he said, “Deadly attraction, this is the deadly attraction.”

So, we have to be careful, but gradually, by following the regulative principles strictly, and serving the spiritual master, heart and soul, without reservation, by his mercy, we can gradually develop the taste for Krishna consciousness, and as the taste for Krishna consciousness develops, we can look at material objects not with the desire or the idea to enjoy, but with the desire or the idea to engage them in Krishna’s service, and then we can preach.

As long as we are too afraid of the material world, we may be subject to phalgu-vairāgya, artificial renunciation, but when we actually become attached to the service of Krishna, we can deal with material things and not become overwhelmed with the idea of enjoying, but rather engaging them in Krishna’s service.

So, one last instruction that Srila Prabhupada gave me. Three of us were actually in the room in Vrindavan, and he said, “When some lady comes, you should not think, This lady has come, let me enjoy her, but you should think, This lady has come to serve Krishna, let me help her.” And this is the principle of bhakti. This is the principle of yukta-vairāgya. But if we are not actually able to engage material things in the service of the Lord, then we should be away from them, and if we have to deal with them, we should do so very carefully.

Once in London, Srila Prabhupada said from the vyāsāsana, “You can fall down, you can fall down, but I cannot fall down.” Then, after the lecture, he went in front of the Deities and was praying to the Deities, and one disciple ventured to ask Srila Prabhupada, “What were you praying in front of the Deities?” And Srila Prabhupada replied, “I was praying to Srimati Radharani that I may never fall down.” Then the devotee said, “But Srila Prabhupada, you just said that you can never fall down.” And Srila Prabhupada replied, “Yes, because I’m always praying that I may never fall down. Therefore, I can never fall down.”

Srila Prabhupada ki jaya! Gaura premānande Hari Haribol!

One question, if there is.

Devotee: You mentioned that someone can, by meditating on the object of the senses, fall down. There is a progression, and then he falls down into the material whirlpool. Is it possible that he can be in the material whirlpool, but still be looking like a sadhu and still be carrying on?

Giriraj Swami: Yes, at least for some time, he can. There are many sadhus in India who adopt the dress of sadhus, but they are actually attached to sense gratification, because they don’t have the higher taste. And once in Los Angeles, Srila Prabhupada said that he had experience with many Mayavadis. They appear to be sadhus, but actually, they indulge in sense gratification. He said he went to one ashram, and he went to use the toilet, and as he was going into the toilet, the head of the ashram was coming out, and Srila Prabhupada said that he could smell ganja.

So, he said that when he has written in his purports that unless one is a devotee and experiences the higher taste, he will fall down, he is not speaking only from theoretical philosophy, but he is also writing from practical experience, that many sadhus who are not actually able to experience the higher taste, they fall down. So, as Srila Prabhupada said, the safest place in the material world is kirtan rasa. If we become absorbed in kirtan rasa, we’ll be protected because we are experiencing a higher taste.

Yamunacharya prayed, “By engaging in the service of the lotus feet of the Lord, I’m experiencing newer and newer pleasure, nava-nava-rasa. And therefore, whenever I think about my past life, and how I used to enjoy with women, my lips curl with disgust, and I spit at the thought.” So, this is the real protection, to experience the higher taste.

Devotee: So, if someone finds himself in a fallen condition, but he is still not away from the association of devotees, can he rectify himself?

Giriraj Swami: Oh yes, very good, very good. The Third Canto of the Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam says that everyone knows that attachment to the material is the greatest cause of bondage for the living entity, but the same attachment, when transferred to the self-realized devotees of the Lord, is the cause of liberation. So, even if one is fallen, if he stays in the association of devotees and becomes attached to the association of devotees, then that attachment will save him.

So, Śrīdhara Swami has actually made a wonderful point, that whatever our condition is; fallen, sinful, or whatever, we should always stay in the association of devotees, of Srila Prabhupada’s family. And by being attached to the association of Srila Prabhupada’s devotees, we will gradually be freed from material attachment.

So, whatever happens, we should never leave the association of Prabhupada’s devotees. And I think this is the main theme now for Prabhupada Centennial, that nobody should leave the association. Those who have left for one reason or another should come back, and those who never had the association should be made aware of Srila Prabhupada and his family, and come into their association.

Srila Prabhupada ki jaya! Srila Prabhupada Centennial ki jaya!