VIHE Holy Name Retreat—Evening Talk and Kirtan

Giriraj Swami: We have all gathered in Vrindavan, and if I ask you, why are you in Vrindavan I imagine that many of you will have different answers. For the sake of time I won’t ask you to raise your hands but within your mind answer the question: “Why are you in Vrindavan? Or Vrajabhumi?” When I ask myself that question, of course, there could be many answers. Probably many of the answers that I could have are the same as many of the answers that you have, but one answer which in a sense is an overriding answer is that we are all here because of Srila Prabhupada. Without Srila Prabhupada I doubt that any of us would be here. In fact, I don’t think any of us would be here because Sacinandana Swami and Bhurijana Prabhu and Mother Prashanta wouldn’t be here either. And if I think further, why are we here in Vrindavan, I think the answer is because Srila Prabhupada left Vrindavan. If Srila Prabhupada hadn’t left Vrindavan, none of us would be here. So Srila Prabhupada’s leaving Vrindavan is very significant for us and for the world.

In one of his early talks in New York City when he first arrived he mentioned how nice Vrindavan was and how much he was feeling separation from Vrindavan. And then as if to anticipate his audience’s questions, “Then why are you here?” In fact, Srila Prabhupada began that, “Then why?” But he didn’t complete the sentence, “Then why are you here?” Srila Prabhupada replied, “Because I have been ordered by my superiors and I have a mission to give this knowledge to all of you.” So that was the mercy of Srila Prabhupada, of course, it was Chaitanya Mahaprabhu’s desire,

pṛthivīte āche yata nagarādi grāma

sarvatra pracāra haibe mora nāma

And in more recent times it was Srila Bhaktivinoda Thakura’s desire and prediction, and Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakura’s ardent desire, and it was Srila Prabhupada who fulfilled that desire and prediction. And in one sense this is the mood of Vrindavan.

Once, one of Srila Prabhupada’s disciples said that in Vrindavan the gopīs are not in the mood to enjoy with Krishna directly but they are in the mood to bring others. And so he likened that activity of bringing people to Krishna to preaching, to book distribution. And some of the other disciples questioned the authenticity of that comparison, but when Srila Prabhupada gave his reply he said, “Yes, this is very nice.” So, as I was discussing recently with Bhurijana Prabhu, in order to have the strength to engage in devotional service we need to engage seriously and sincerely in chanting and hearing about Krishna. That is why we are all here, to deepen our relationship with the holy name which means Krishna. And there is a technical aspect to that activity, our posture, our pronunciation, our minds, our hearts. But when that chanting and hearing reaches a certain point one will feel a natural sense of compassion and that compassion will be manifest in the endeavor to bring others to Krishna, to bring others to Vrindavan. And having had the opportunity to be with Srila Prabhupada personally I know that he felt separation from Vrindavan.

Once I was with him in his room in Los Angeles and maybe after a number of meetings, he reclined on the bolsters behind him and quoted a verse from Narottama dasa Thakura, viṣaya chādiyā kabe śuddha ha’be mana, that when my mind is free from viṣaya then I will be able to enter Vrindavan. And Srila Prabhupada, perhaps noticing his neophyte disciple sitting in the room, clarified what he meant. He said, of course, it is not viṣaya, generally viṣaya means the objects of the senses or sense gratification. He said, “Of course, it is not viṣaya, it is Krishna’s service. But still, I hanker for Vrindavan.” So it was not a small sacrifice for Srila Prabhupada to leave Vrindavan, although he was ordered by the higher authorities and he was fully obedient to them, and although he did want to do something for all of us, to help us to become happy, but it was a sacrifice and we should appreciate his sacrifice because of his sacrifice we are here.

Now, I will read one verse and purport very short, very short, but it will give you a sense of what it means to leave Vrindavan, and also what it means to return to Vrindavan which Srila Prabhupada did. This verse comes in Śrī Caitanya-caritāmṛta, Madhya-līlā, Chapter Thirteen, “The Lord Dancing at Ratha-yātrā.” And the Ratha-yatra as experienced by Sri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu was a recreation of the meeting of the residents of Vrindavan with Krishna at Kurukshetra, at the time of the solar eclipse. And in this envisioning of the Ratha-yatra, Lord Chaitanya is in the mood of Srimati Radharani meeting Krishna at Kurukshetra after long separation. But although she was the same Radha and He was the same Krishna she could not experience the same happiness because they were not in Vrindavan. There was no Govardhana Hill, there was no Yamuna river. Instead of the chirping of birds and dancing of peacocks there was the rumbling of chariots and pounding of the hoofs of horses and elephants. And instead of seeing beautiful Shyamasundara, tribhaṅga-lalitaṁ, with the flute in His hand and peacock feather in His hair, He was dressed in this heavy royal garb and instead of the cows and cowherd boys there are all these ministers and soldiers. So, Srimati Radharani could not feel the same happiness with Krishna in Kurukshetra so She wanted Him to come back to Vrindavan. And in the Ratha-yatra, Lord Chaitanya is in the mood of Radharani at Kurukshetra trying to pull Krishna back to Vrindavan.

So this mood is generally discussed from the point of view of Radharani but Krishna also feels separation when He leaves Vrindavan. He is more attached to the residents of Vrindavan than to any other devotees in Mathura or Dvaraka or anywhere, and He loves Govardhana Hill and the Yamuna river more than He cares for any other place. So He also feels separation from Vrindavan. And in this dialogue between Lord Chaitanya and Lord Jagannatha, or Srimati Radharani and Lord Krishna, Lord Jagannatha says that He cries, or Krishna says that He cries day and night feeling separation from Vrindavan, and especially, the gopīs, and especially, Srimati Radharani.

Then why did He leave Vrindavan? Why is He not coming back? Because He had some service to do. He wanted to kill some demons so that Vrindavan would be safe for His beloved, and there were other reasons, to satisfy the members of the Yadu dynasty. And so even Krishna sacrifices the happiness of Vrindavan for the sake of service. And in this brief verse and purport that I am going to read, Srila Prabhupada. . . well, I will just read it and you will see how nicely it expresses Srila Prabhupada’s mood with reference to Krishna in this dialogue. Text One Hundred and Fifty-six; This is Krishna responding to Srimati Radharani.

TEXT 156

“I have already killed all the mischievous demons who are enemies of the Yadu dynasty, and I have also killed Kaṁsa and his allies. But there are two or four demons still living. I want to kill them, and after doing so I shall very soon return to Vṛndāvana. Please know this for certain.

PURPORT by Srila Prabhupada

Just as Kṛṣṇa does not take a step away from Vṛndāvana, Kṛṣṇa’s devotee also does not like to leave Vṛndāvana. However, when he has to tend to Kṛṣṇa’s business, he leaves Vṛndāvana. After finishing his mission, a pure devotee returns home, back to Vṛndāvana, back to Godhead.

COMMENT

So these, two or three, sentences really describes the trajectory of Srila Prabhupada’s life. He came to Vrindavan, he didn’t want to leave Vrindavan but to tend to Krishna’s business he left. But after his mission was completed as far as possible under the circumstances, he returned home. Prabhupada said, “Bombay is my office, Vrindavan is my home, and Mayapur is my place of worship.”

PURPORT (continued)

After finishing his mission, a pure devotee returns home, back to Vṛndāvana, back to Godhead.

COMMENT

And when Srila Prabhupada did return to Vrindavan at the very end, he did show us how to return back to Godhead, how to leave our bodies absorbed in Krishna consciousness. Of course, he showed us how to do everything absorbed in Krishna consciousness. And we can help make his mission successful by understanding what he came to teach and actualizing it. I will just read a little from the previous purport.

TEXT 155 PURPORT

During his lifetime a pure devotee is always speaking of Kṛṣṇa and engaging in His service, and as soon as he gives up his body he immediately returns to Goloka Vṛndāvana, where Kṛṣṇa is personally present. He then meets Kṛṣṇa directly. This is successful human life. This is the meaning of prakaṭeha ānibe satvara: The pure devotee will soon see the personal manifestation of Lord Śrī Kṛṣṇa.

COMMENT

Now, there is another layer of meaning to the idea that Srila Prabhupada left Vrindavan. So far we have discussed his leaving Boma Vrindavan, but there is a possibility, I would say a strong possibility, that he left Goloka Vrindavan. Now, this could be considered a little either controversial or subjective but there are indications. It is not something that Srila Prabhupada spoke about very openly, but I thought to share with you a poem that Her Grace Daivi Shakti dasi, Srila Prabhupada’s disciple, wrote for Srila Prabhupada’s disappearance day. And in this poem, she describes a conversation she had with Gita devi Saraf who was the lady who donated the land for the Krishna-Balarama temple. And after Prabhupada left, Gita devi was quite elderly and she called Daivi Shakti and said, “I want to tell you something very confidential so I don’t want to speak here. Let us go somewhere and I will speak to you.” And it is a very sweet poem, I couldn’t print it out. I have never done this before but I am going to read it from my iPhone which doesn’t work in India to make phone calls but that is okay. So yes, this is from 2003. One evening Gita devi confided in Daivi Shakti and here’s her poem. She said,

You know, Srila Prabhupada was just like my own father.
He cared for me, and that was why I gave to him and no other.
He told me a secret once, when we were all alone.
I will tell you what he said to me, it is something you should know.
 
I came to see him one evening. He was sitting in his garden.
Devotees sat by his feet, secretary and servants all around.
As I came close, he smiled at me and told them all to go.
I sat nearby his lotus feet, and this is what he told.
 
‘Krsna sent me here to preach. He sent me from above.
With English, Bengali, and Hindi I could preach all over the world.
I have almost finished my task, and soon I will return to Him.’
He told her this in 1976; soon our lives went dim.

[COMMENT] This is Daivi Shakti speaking in her poem.

I was amazed at what Prabhupada had revealed to her alone.
She knew he came from Krsna and would soon be going home.
Such wisdom was not wasted on an ordinary jiva.
This blessing was hers from Prabhupada—confidentiality.
 
As we drove, she took my hand and made a simple wish.
She asked me in sincerity, “Please teach me to speak English.”
“But Gita Devi, you are so old, your precious time will be wasted.”
“No,” she said, “I also want to preach as Prabhupada did.”
 
I looked at her in amazement; she really wanted to preach.
She had been transformed by Srila Prabhupada’s grace.
By associating with fire, one becomes like fire; I saw
Her desire to preach like Prabhupada in an old woman bereft of all.
 
The inspiration she received from a moment of Prabhupada’s love
Reminds us how compassionate he was to come here from above.

Srila Prabhupada, ki jaya!

Gita devi Saraf, ki jaya!

Daivi Shakti Mataji, ki jaya!

Would any of you like to add anything?

Devotee: Yes, I want to add that you should speak more. [laughter]Does anyone like to [Unintelligible 00:30:57]. What to do?

Giriraj Swami: All right, since I am sharing, I guess confidential favorite poems, I will share another one. This goes back to late in 1977. Srila Prabhupada was in Juhu, he had come from England and was lying on his bed in his room in Juhu, he could not do more than that physically. Coincidentally, I also was a little sick, I don’t remember what it was, yes, there are many choices in India, could have been diarrhea, it could have been a fever, yes, it could have been flu. But anyway, it was in 1977 and I was in my little office which, in the previous construction it had been a bathroom so it was pretty small. And I was lying down and in my whole devotional career until then I had never listened to any music other than Srila Prabhupada’s or recordings of devotees singing the Hare Krishna maha-mantra, the songs of the Vaishnava acharyas. But someone gave me a tape of Mangalananda singing some songs. And not having much to do in that little room I put it on, and I was actually quite impressed by the music and the lyrics. And one song in particular really moved me and I listened to this song again and again and again and thought of Srila Prabhupada. Somehow the words to that song seemed to describe Srila Prabhupada as I was apprehending his imminent departure.

So again, I am going to sing it, but believe me, Mangalananda has a better voice, but I am still going to.

Selflessness relieves distress
Gentle rain of happiness
Puts out the burning fire of life
Transports the soul beyond all strife

Past starry night and cruel death
For those who give their living breath
Upon their lips the Holy Name
In praise of He who came
To them a store of bliss is known
And hidden worlds to them are shown

So this, it just seemed to be about Srila Prabhupada, although it is a process, it is like what Bhurijana Prabhu demonstrated last night with the screen. But this gives a nice idea of what the qualification is to see those hidden worlds, selflessness, selfless service. Anyway.

Upon their lips the Holy Name
In praise of He who came
To them a store of bliss is known
And hidden worlds to them are shown

And then the song concludes with a beautiful description of the spiritual abode and the life that awaits us there.

Where the  Supreme Lord fills every eye
Sweet jubilation fills the sky
As dancing milkmaids and cowherd boys
Play in forests green with joys

Of bael and jack fruit, lily white
An endless full moon, nectar night
Of dancing magic, loving smiles
And gopī damsels’ playful wiles
They sport in lotus lakes with He
Whose glances taste of ecstasy

So, I thought of Srila Prabhupada, that is where he is going, and I thought that that is also where I want to go. And that if I followed what Prabhupada taught, what the song said, I could go. Now reading it, it is so simple even this section of Caitanya-caritāmṛta, is just so simple.

TEXT 155 PURPORT (continued)

Devotees who are always absorbed in thoughts of Kṛṣṇa will soon see Kṛṣṇa face to face without a doubt. Devotees who are always engaged in Kṛṣṇa consciousness and are fully absorbed in thoughts of Kṛṣṇa certainly return home, back to Godhead. Then they see Kṛṣṇa directly, face to face, talk with Him and enjoy His company.

COMMENT

So when I read this I thought, this is so easy, to stay in Barsana with Bhurijana Prabhu, and Sacinandana Swami, and all these wonderful devotees and just think of Krishna day and night. And that is good for a while, as long as it lasts. But then leaving Vrindavan, if we are in that position, we should also always think of Krishna as Srila Prabhupada did. Wherever he was he was always thinking of Krishna. And when you walked into Srila Prabhupada’s presence you actually felt like you were in the spiritual world; it wasn’t ordinary. So of course, we can’t be like Srila Prabhupada, but we can try to follow his instructions, and he did want us to think of Krishna. And he actually said that the best way to think of Krishna is to preach because when you preach people have questions and to think of the answers you have to think of Krishna.

Bhurijana Prabhu has often said, “The best way to learn something is to teach it.” So yes, preaching is really śravaṇaṁ kīrtanaṁ viṣṇoḥ smaraṇaṁ, but it is done in such a way as to give Krishna more pleasure by bringing more people to Krishna. And it is a matter of taste. Once in 1976 Srila Prabhupada went to a place called Panchgani near Mahabaleshwar. They say that Kashmir is the Switzerland of India and they say that Mahabaleshwar is the Kashmir of Maharashtra. So, many wealthy people go there, especially during the hot season, and Mr. Malhotra, these two brothers, Malhotra brothers, they had some property there that they wanted to offer to Srila Prabhupada so we went there. And I think maybe the first afternoon, the brothers and their wives went out and I think there was yes maybe a third brother was a little different. So Srila Prabhupada just in the afternoon he came out and sat down in the living room and there was no one there so then we came and he just wanted to preach. And I heard that subsequently from some of Prabhupada’s servants that sometimes if there is no one else to preach to he would call them in and preach to them. It was just so much in him, there was so much in him.

And our dear godbrother Vaisesika Prabhu, he has been asked to write a book on book-distribution because he has such deep realizations, and I spent a night at his home and his morning program is so powerful. I mean I don’t know how many of you have gotten to spend time with Vaisesika Prabhu but he is so enthusiastic about Krishna consciousness, he is just so enthusiastic. And because of his enthusiasm and absorption, every element of his morning program came to life, even things that we might do as a routine came to life, and it was just him and his wife but she wasn’t involved in the worship, maybe she did some of the backup. And as part of his morning program he recited the Īśopaniṣad, and that recitation of the Īśopaniṣad was so relishable because of his taste, and he has his deities, he did his deity worship, and reciting prayers, singing songs; it was so powerful. And afterwards we were discussing the book and he said that the main theme of his book, or at least the main point he wants to make in his book, is that preaching and book distribution should be the overflow of the ecstasy one feels from one’s sadhana. And that is his realization and just by being with him you feel the same way. And that is what our acharyas have also said, Bhaktivinoda Thakura.

So this retreat is very important. It is very important to infuse us with Krishna, Krishna consciousness, and that infusion of Krishna consciousness will animate us, and inspire us, and empower us. I am saying this to you, I am also trying to preach to myself because I just got here and I am in the mood of absorbing quite frankly, but of course, it is always reciprocal. You eat and you get energy and then you have to exercise. If you just eat and don’t exercise you just get fat, and if you just exercise and don’t eat you will become weak, so we have to do both. So these retreats are a wonderful opportunity going on parikramā, attending the programs at the temple, it is all Prabhupada’s mercy upon us. And yes, he is, I would say, smiling benignly upon us all for making this effort but we shouldn’t take any of it for granted. We should cherish every moment that we have here and cherish every particle of mercy that we receive and make it multiply by sharing it with others.

This guest house where we are staying, the Ghanshyam dasa Binani Guest House, I made Ghanshyam dasa Binani a life member in Bombay. I mean everything is interrelated. And he was quite tough. I had to go to him many times and he was quite contrary, and in the end, he agreed to become a life member and he confessed about himself he said, “I was just testing you, I was being as, I mean in a polite Indian way but, as rude as I could be, and you never got angry, you never lost your temper, you never gave up on me. So, I have decided to become a life member.” So then we were collecting for the Juhu project and different causes, so he wanted to give a donation to subsidize the magazine, the Hindi Back to Godhead called Bhāgavata-darshana. And he wanted his name published in a line in the front, something like ‘Courtesy of Ghanshyam dasa Binani Charitable Trust’ and I felt that the amount that he wanted to give for that honor or claim was not enough. And I told him as much and then I would go back, I had reported to Srila Prabhupada and he said, “Yes, you have done right. He has to give more.” That one didn’t work out.

Then I was collecting for the school in Juhu and one of the big items was the hall. So he wanted it to be called the Ghanshyam dasa Binani Hall and we had our figure, he named a lower figure. So, that was all very congenial, just smiling, nothing but smiles, and I said, “Mr. Binani that is really not enough for the hall, I mean the hall is the biggest room in the whole project you really have to give more. But if you want to give that figure it is okay, we can put two classrooms in your name.” But no, that wasn’t enough. And then he came up, he came up to the required amount. So, Srila Prabhupada said, “Okay, that is the way it should be.” So he was a very practical person, Srila Prabhupada and that is also part of Krishna consciousness. Actually, anything and everything can be used in Krishna’s service, nothing is excluded. And chanting and hearing and purifying our hearts, we can get that inspiration how to use everything in Krishna’s service. And whatever you are because we all have different natures, it really doesn’t even matter what our nature is because whatever it is we can use it in Krishna’s service, in the proper way. So, this is also a great facility. Actually, to chant twenty-four hours a day you have to be on the liberated platform. So we are trying to come to that stage but we are not at that stage. So, what are we going to do in the time when we are not chanting and hearing? Of course, we want to increase the proportion of time we spend chanting and hearing, but we can engage it in service that will please guru and Krishna.

So, just one last thought, it just came to my mind. Srila Prabhupada was discussing the Bhagavad-gītā beginning from the First Chapter. And right at the beginning of the First Chapter Dhṛtaraṣṭra asks his secretary Sanjay, “What did my sons and the sons of Pandu do?” Now, Srila Prabhupada says this seems like a ridiculous question. They gathered on the battlefield to fight, they were all armed, they were ready to fight, so what is the meaning of this question? What did my sons and the sons of Pandu do? It is like a person comes to the dining hall, he sits down, he is hungry, there is a plate of prasāda, there is a person to serve the prasāda, and just at the moment he is supposed to eat someone asks, “Well, then what did he do? Well, what is the meaning of that question? Then what did he do?” Well, he ate, of course, why did he come to the table? Why was there a plate of food in front of him? He came to eat so what is this meaning? They came to the field, they were armed ready to fight, so what is the meaning of this? What did they do?” There is a meaning. The meaning is that Dhṛtaraṣṭra was afraid that the influence of the holy place of Kurukshetra would make them change their mind and he didn’t want them to change their mind. He wanted them to fight and he wanted his son to be victorious. So this is the influence of holy places, even Kurukshetra.

So we are here to take advantage of the influence of this holy place so that whatever other ideas we might have that are not so well, I don’t know if you have any, I do, are not so congenial for pure devotional service, those can be removed by the influence of the holy place. And because we have assembled to chant and hear the holy names, the influence of the holy place will be favorable. So it won’t happen that you go back and you went to Barsana, and there was a holy name retreat, and you were going to chant the holy name, and then what happened? Well, we chanted the holy name and that is what we are going to do right now and tomorrow and the next day and forever.

Hare Krishna.